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[personal profile] askmetobelieve
Yes I'm going to CHURCH in the morning. My dad asked me to and I have a hard time saying no. He's just like me, he never likes going places alone. It's just hard for me sitting there knowing that if they knew that I was trans or even bi, that they would probably kick me out on my ass. Or try to pray it out of me. Either way it wouldn't be good. They're Pentecostal and that is a very strict denomination, like word for word from the bible strict. The last time they went on and on about how this gay and lesbian dance that another church was holding was going against the bible and this and that. And I know what you're thinking "Well, why don't you go to the church that accepts lgbt people?" And I went once. It was...interesting to say the least. I can relate to their ideas a lot better than the one I'll be going to tomorrow. But the service was just weird. I didn't even feel like I was going to rot in hell after it was over. And you know you haven't been to church until you feel like you're a sinner and going to hell the moment you step out the door. Or at least that has been my experience with churches. Which was probably why thte  trans friendly church didn't feel right. But I'd be willing to go again, even a few times. Dad however isn't to up to the idea of going again. And seeing as we only have one car and the services are at the same time, well it'd be a little hard. He could drop me off but you never know when a Pentecostal church is going to let out. Could be noon, could be 3. Seriously, you never know. And I'm not standing on the street like some hooker outside of the church. Doubt they would want me hanging around however long it would take the old man to come and get me. Anyways, I'm headed to bed for the night. Or I'm going to try and go to bed. We'll see how it goes.
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23, live in Manassas, Virginia. I have bipolar disorder and PTSD. I am transgender [pre-everything]

August 2009

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