Aug. 17th, 2009

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I came out to my dad tonight! We were watching a show on sex reassignment surgeries and he asked me if I'd thought about having one. At first I said no, but then I ended up saying yes I had. I was so scared. But he just hugged me and told me he loved me. He said that he thought that was the case anyways. He's been thinking I wanted to be a boy since I bought my first binder a few months back. So needless to say it has had time to sink in and he wasn't all that surprised. Which was amazing, and so much easier than I thought it would be. I told him that people knew me as Cole.  and later in the conversation he said "Well, you're still Melissa.. I mean Cole." Which surprised me, I didn't think he'd be able to use my name in a sentence at all. He said he supported me no matter what but if I wanted any surgeries I was going to have to pay for them. So needless to say I'm a very happy guy right about now.
 
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I look a little pissed off in the last one but I still like it.
Do you think I pass okay?
I'm getting called sir and dude more often.
Which is something I love!
 
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tomorrow. Anyone want to go for me? I don't feel like going. Well, part of me doesn't. Then there is that part that wants to tell her just how well my dad took the news. Which I'm still in a little shock about. I even got him to agree to go to a pflag meeting. But in return he wants me to go to a support group for glbt people. And that makes me nervous. Why? I really don't know. You know me and my anxiety about meeting new people. You'd think some of these meds I'm on would do something about that. My therpist thinks I'm on the wrong meds anyways. I've been waiting 2 1/2 weeks for my psychiatrist to get back to me to make an appointment. I'm starting to look for a new one, because that's just crazy having to wait that long for a simple phone call. Anywyas, enough bitching for today. Unless I get an urge later, which just might happen. It is early after all...

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Cole

Cole...

23, live in Manassas, Virginia. I have bipolar disorder and PTSD. I am transgender [pre-everything]

August 2009

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